It has been pouring rain for two days, the front walk and back are flooding, the TV won’t work and I am tired of cleaning. I keep trying to read but my mind keeps chattering away all by itself. Does time move in a circle? What if I can’t find my passion? How do I forgive myself for past missteps? How do I trust I will make right choices in the future or will I trick myself again. Does single-mindedly pursuing a goal rob us of the other places I might have gone? Retail therapy works until the bills come due. Breathe..just breath..this too shall pass.
Ten days until my house move. A chaos of boxes in every room. My body is sore and my mind bordering an full-blown crazy. My dear Bella dog keeps looking to me for support and she misses our wonderful walks. I sat quietly and meditated on what advice would I give someone else. The answer was clear – get out of the house, go for a walk!
The Point Lookout Trail is here in Black Mountain and goes through private land into the National Forest. When I got home, I felt like I had been on vacation. I give good advice.
I subscribe to a newletter from Lissa Ranking - her discussion today was about fear and courage. It began talking about the massarce in Colorado and the heroism people had shown. Then she asked “Are you brave? What is the bravest thing you have ever done?” I have been thinking about this all day. There are incidents that came to mind but I was inclined to say that they were not big enough. Courage is defined as being afraid but acting anyway. What looks tiny to an outsider can be huge to the person involved. I will share a tiny thing that took great courage for me. When I was a young girl I was terrified of the dark. At the door of my bedroom I would slide my hand around the door frame so I could turn on the light before I entered. I talked myself into the courage to just walk in and then turn the light on. After I did it once I could do it again but I was never as proud of myself as I was that first time.
In my reader I found a post by Heart to Harp about facing her fear of playing the irish harp in public. She volunteered to play at a hospice center and shared the experience with us the readers. I think the post and the act are pretty awesome.
I wish Love and Courage for us all. How were you brave today?